Sunday 5 December 2010

People who drive in 2 feet of snow, without snow tyres.

So I like driving, I enjoy the open road.
I also enjoy snow, very much in fact. It’s white, it’s fluffy and let’s face it: IT IS FAN-FUCKING-TASTIC.
I also like the two put together, it just makes everything that much more exciting, you can do things with your car that you just can’t in the summer.
What I don’t like, are those people who don’t give a flying fuck about life and limbs of their fellow drivers on the road.
These ignorant cunts believe that it is perfectly alright to drive around on their summer tyres or even slicks in the middle of fucking winter, WTF?
These people come in three categories:

1: The slowpoke
This driver has decided that the three-four months of snow a year doesn’t require him to spend a half an hour to change his tyres, but he still doesn’t want to die in a terrible car crash.
The result?
You get the slowest vehicle in the whole bleeding world, slower than a tractor, a handicap-scooter and even the occasional tectonic plate.
This driver slows traffic to a halt and forces everybody else to make dangerous overtakings and makes parking attendants question whether they should give a push or write out a parking ticket.

2: The boy racer
This guy is probably the worst of them all, he knows he has zero traction, he knows that he will probably kill some poor, innocent person in the crash he is going to cause in 21.5 minutes and he knows that he has to crank his music out even louder now, since he can’t drive with the windows wide open.
Does this stop the bastard?
No, on the other hand he will likely fill the car up with 4-5 douchebags and go for a drive, music blasting (of course).
Would you please wrap that car around a fucking tree?

3: The Auto Alliance member
Probably the most sensible of the three, but still a major cunt.
This driver has read about 241 magazines about how to drive safely during the winter, he however decided that shelling out the £300 for a set of winter tyres was just a little too expensive.
So he drives sensibly, but what good does this do when you’re on black ice and you’re driving 40MPH through a soft bend with a big red oak just at the outside apex of the corner.
Just a tip: those winter-driving guides are made for people on winter tyres.
I predict crashing, a lot.

I hope you liked this first post of mine, if you did, please leave comments for me.
If you didn’t like it, please leave a comment, saying what you didn’t like, no flamers or trolls please.
If you’re a grammar Nazi: congratulations so am I, that doesn’t make me perfect (English is not my native language), but please leave a rage-post for me to laugh at.
In my upcoming posts I might include photos, but let's see if people like to hear what I hate first.

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